Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

What is it like to use a Fleshlight?

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

Elden Ring Nightreign devs confirm they’re working on a duos mode - Polygon

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

Uber announces a life-changing new feature - TheStreet

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

Have husbands and wives ever had a threesome with someone in real life? How did it happen?

I don’t buy bullshit

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

NASA withdraws support for conferences - SpaceNews

I have complete contempt for fakery

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

Florida farmers now plowing over perfectly good tomatoes as Trump’s tariff policies cause prices to plummet - Yahoo

I understand how hurricane paths work

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

Summer Game Fest June 2025: Everything announced - Eurogamer

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

Inflation slides to 1.9% in Europe, as worries shift from prices to Trump and tariffs - AP News

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

Rare Red Sprite Photographed in Tibet Dazzles Social Media - PetaPixel

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

Does turmeric help fight cancer? If so, how?

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

What is the Replika app, and how does it work?

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

Is it okay for my husband to help other ladies without telling me?

I actually pay taxes

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

Was there any slavery of white people that actually compares to the transatlantic slave trade? I’m not baiting or anything actually genuinely curious and want to know.

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

A Researcher Figured Out How to Reveal Any Phone Number Linked to a Google Account - WIRED

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

I don’t cotton to rapists

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

I can read

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

I have a reading level above third grade

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

I know who the president of Turkey really is

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

I can count

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

I see through liars

I have complete contempt for traitorism

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee